8/7 WNC BeatDown Results!

[Mike Jones]

8/7 WNC BeatDown Results!

(The WNC logo appears and fades and the BeatDown video plays.)

(After the video is done, we head to ringside just as Money by the O’Jays hits to mostly heat.)

DING DING DING!

Jillian Marcia: The following contest is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada, Kid Dynomite Raine Price!

TM: Good evening, everyone and welcome to the sold out National Car Rental Center in sunny Fort Lauderdale, Florida, just six days before WNC Summer Blast for a HUGE Special One Hour BeatDown tonight. Folks, I’m Tim Moss, alongside Larry “The King” Fowler, and King what a way to start than with the undefeated Raine Price!

King: Absolutely, this Sunday, he’s gonna be in the pre-PPV match on WNC.Com facing off against another newcomer, “The Forgotten One” Victor!

(Carolina Pride by Numb hits to mostly heat.)

TM: But tonight, he’ll have to face off with Dimes!

And the opponent, from New York, New York, Dimes!

DING DING DING!

And here we go! Dimes runs at Kid Dynomite looking for a Clothesline but Dynomite ducks and nails a German Suplex! Kid Dynomite gets him up! DOUBLE UNDERHOOK FAME ASSER! Now Dynomite locks in the Spoiled Brat Reverse DDT Dragon Choke! Dimes taps! Dimes taps!

DING DING DING!

Here is your winner, Kid Dynomite!

TM: What an impressive victory for Kid Dynomite!

(Kid Dynomite takes the microphone from Jillian.)

Kid Dynomite: Ever since I came to the WNC, I have done everything I said I would and that is kick anyone’s ass who gets in my way. And tonight, I did just that, and this Sunday, I face the “Forgotten One” Victor. Well let me tell you something, pal, as if you weren’t “forgettable” enough, you will DEFINETLY be forgotten after I steamroll your ass in this ring! Cuz unlike you, I’m going to be someone who will be remembered for years!

TM: Well some very confident words there from Kid Dynomite, who remains undefeated here in the WNC, but folks right now we have to show you the absolutely shocking final moments of BeatDown last week. It was Jesse and Kenua challenging FTW for the tag team titles, but what happened at the end was absolutely shocking!

(We go to a replay of the last few minutes.)

(Jesse picks up Destroyer! THE JESSINATOR! HIGH ANGLE BRAINBUSTER DDT CONNECTS! Jesse signals for the 780! He heads up top! NO! HANNAH HARPER JUST PULLED THE TOP ROPE AND JESSE NUTTED HIMSELF! WAIT A MINUTE! THERE’S LUCHARA! LUCHARA SPEARS HANNAH HARPER! CAT FIGHT! CATTT FIIIIIGGGGGGHHHHTTT!!!! WHAT THE HELL! NATURAL JUST GRABBED LUCHARA AND SLAMMED HER BACK FIRST INTO THE STEEL STEPS! OH MY GOD! LUCHARA COULD BE SERIOUSLY HURT! Kenua runs over to check on her! Wait a minute! What the hell is the Destroyer doing! THE SUPER DESTROYER ON JESSE! NO! JESSE COUNTERED IT INTO A SUNSET FLIP POWERBOMB! JESSE NAILS THE MINDBENDER! OH NO! NATURAL JUST CRACKED JESSE WITH THE TAG TITLE! THE REF DIDN’T SEE IT AS HE WAS BUSY ATTENDING TO LUCHARA ON THE OUTSIDE! Natural puts Destroyers arm over Jesse and yells at the ref! KENUA! GET IN THERE! HE DOESN’T SEE THE PIN! THE REF COUNTS! ONE! TWO! THREE!)

(Crowd boos!)

DING DING DING!

Here are your winners, and STILL the WNC Tag Team Champions, Mr. Natural and the Destroyer!

(Natural and Destroyer take the belts and take off up the stage as fans surround them with boos! Kenua is shocked. Jesse sits up in pain, he doesn’t look happy. Kenua gets in the ring now with Jesse.)

TM: Kenua appears to be apologizing. Jesse is absolutely berating Kenua here! Kenua reaches out his hand and helps Jesse to his feet! The two argue for a moment. Then Jesse sighs and puts out his hand and the two embrace. The crowd on their feet for these two! They came so close! Kenua and Jesse salute the crowd who are standing and cheering! WHAT THE HELL?????! JESSE JUST NAILED KENUA FROM BEHIND!

(HUGE BOOS!)

TM: WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE! JESSE JUST KNOCKED KENUA OUT COLD WITH A SHOT TO THE BACK OF THE HEAD! MY GOD!

(Fans boo like crazy and begin throwing garbage in the ring!)

TM: WHAT THE HELL IS THIS??? JESSE JUST ATTACKED HIS PARTNER! HIS FRIEND! THAT SON OF A BITCH! WHAT THE HELL IS HIS PROBLEM!

(We head back to live footage backstage and we see Jesse in a sports jacket making his way to the ring to big heat. He passes several superstars including Alex Seeker, Ty Langston, Sheena Michaels, Da Gangsta and Ally Rogers who all seem to be dissapointed and surprised by his actions last week.)

TM: Well folks, hopefully we will get some kind of an explanation here from Jesse as he’s headed out here.

(We head to commercials.)

(We come back from commercials as Set It Off Tweeker Mix by P.O.D. hits to HUGE HEAT as Jesse walks out in a sports jacket with microphone in hand.)

(Jesse gets in the ring and the music stops. The fans chant asshole and boo more.)

Jesse: All of you shut the hell up and let me talk!

(Big heat!)

Jesse: A few weeks ago, I was sitting backstage in that very locker room, and I came to an epiphany. I was sitting back there wallowing in defeat, yet again, because my partner couldn’t keep his head on the game, instead he was too damn focused on some girl. Part of me thought, meh, he’s just a young guy, he’s got hormones and feelings, it’ll be over in a week. Another part of me felt, ya know he’s my friend, and maybe I should be happy for him. But then I realized, wait a minute, my name isn’t Kenua, my name is Jesse. This shouldn’t be about him! No! I need to focus on me! And hey, I was honestly contemplating leaving the Three Amigo’s, on good terms of course. Then Eddie got hurt, and somehow we managed to get a title shot. So, I figured, sure I’ll run with it, championship gold is always good for my resume’. But then Kenua screwed it up. AGAIN!

(Crowd boos!)

Jesse: And I finally realized it, you know what, all those people who’ve stabbed me in the back were right! As much as I hate to admit it, J-Master was right. Natural and the Destroyer were right! This business is not about making friends and selling t-shirts, it’s about winning matches! And quite frankly, now that I realize that, I’m ready to get back to my winning ways. I don’t give a rat’s ass about anyone in the back room anymore. I don’t give a rat’s ass about any of you moronic fans, especially you idiots in Florida who can’t even figure out how to vote in an election without screwing it up!

(HUGE HEAT!)

Jesse: See, I finally figured it out. This isn’t about any of you no-good selfish pricks! (HUGE HEAT!) This is about me! This about me being the MAIN EVENT! This about me being the WORLD CHAMPION! This is about ME! Not about stupid tag teams or factions! Not about stupid backstage segments and sketches! Not about lame ass food fights! Not about trying to “entertain” the fans. I’M SICK OF THAT AND I’M SICK OF TRYING TO IMPRESS EACH AND EVERY ONE OF YOU! I AM ABOVE ALL OF YOU! I DON’T NEED TO DO A DAMN THING TO IMPRESS YOU! MY ACCOMPLISHMENTS SPEAK FOR THEMSELVES!

(CROWD POPS HUGE AS KENUA COMES RUNNING DOWN THE RAMP!)

TM: WAIT A MINUTE THERE’S KENUA! KENUA IS BEATING THE HELL OUT OF JESSE! THESE TWO MEN ARE BEATING THE HELL OUT OF EACH OTHER!

(Born In the USA by Bruce Springsteen hits to a mixed reaction as the C.E.O. Charles Kennedy comes out with several referee’s and security guards who run to the ring and begin seperating the two men.)

Charles Kennedy: Stop it right now! You two want each other so bad! Well, then this Sunday, at WNC Summer Blast, it’s gonna happen! That’s right! This Sunday! Jesse vs. Kenua! One on One! In that Very Ring!

(Crowd Pops Huge as Jesse and Kenua are both restrained.)

TM: My GOD! That’s huge news! Finally, this Sunday, Kenua will get his hands on Jesse!

(We head to commercial as Jesse and Kenua break free and begin brawling again before finally being seperated.)

(We come back from commercial and head to a music video showcasing the brutal feud between West Coast Wonder and Venom set to “I Don’t Feel Very Receptive Today” by Underoath. We see footage of their intense rivalry from ECWF, XWA, NBWF and others as well as recent WNC footage.)

TM: Folks, that’s right, this Sunday at WNC Summer Blast, it all comes to a head for West Coast Wonder and Venom. It will be a hellacious best 2 out of 3 falls match! The first fall is No Disqualification. The second is a TLC match and the third and final fall will be a Hell In a Cell match!

King: Absolutely, it’s going to be a hellacious night this Sunday!

(World Wide Suicide by Pearl Jam begins playing.)

King: This Sunday, the WNC presents WNC SummerBlast! A huge Main Event! A 60 Minute Iron Man Match with the WNC World Heavyweight Title on the line as Matt Ackerman defends against a man who has never been pinned in the WNC, Mr. Reality Shane Warner!

TM: But what is the physical condition of Matt Ackerman? At this point, we don’t even know if he’s been medically cleared to wrestle!

King: And what about what we just heard before the break? It’s going to be the Self Proclaimed Main Event Jesse facing off against his former best friend Kenua!

TM: You talk about a personal match, these two men were like brothers before Jesse stabbed Kenua in the back!

King: Oh, and speaking of personal, what about this one?

(Caption pops up.)

TM: Oh absolutely, for weeks now, Wrestling God and Chris Jericho have been blackmailing one another. The result? An epic ladder match this Sunday at Summer Blast! Among the contents of that briefcase, lewd photo’s Wrestling God allegedly took of Chris Jericho’s wife, “alleged” undisputed evidence against Jericho’s son vandalizing a school, and some important tax papers that apparently reveal Wrestling God’s stock undergoing a conflict of interest!

King: And the WNC Pure Title is on the line as Countdown uses his rematch clause against X-Pac 360!

TM: Not to mention, a unique match as Raw Impact challenges the Iron Rodger in a “Walk the Plank” match.

King: What the hell is a Walk the Plank match?

TM: I have no clue King.

King: But we sure as hell know what a Last Man Standing match is and how bloody they can get. Compton’s Most Wanted looks for revenge from one of the most humiliating defeats of his career as he squares off with Bob in a match so brutal, so sadistic, that the only way to win is by incapacitating your opponent for a full ten count.

TM: Right, and for the first time EVER, the WNC Woman’s Title will be decided in a FIRST BLOOD MATCH! The Champion Savannah, defends against RKO Sledge Angel. These two have collided many times in the past, and something tells me this is gonna be the end of it.

King: We can only hope, but what about this one? A Tag Team Casket match?

TM: Absolutely, it’s the Dead Man and the rookie Dark Warrior Lord Malichi teaming up against the WNC Hardcore Champion Mike Becker and the 500 plus pound giant Paul Bunyan!

King: The rules are simple, the first team to put both of their opponents inside a casket will be the winner! Once the casket is closed, it is locked! So if one person gets eliminated, then effectively their partner is in a handicap match!

TM: Absolutely, and that’s a dangerous situation.

King: And of course, we saw Kid Dynomite in action earlier tonight. He’s gonna be taking on another up and comer in “The Forgotten One” Victor!

TM: And folks we’ve just found out that the WNC Tag Team titles will be on the line this Sunday as Mr. Natural and the Destroyer defend their belts against Sheena Michaels and Ty Langston in a Steel Cage!

(Born of Anger by Fozzy hits to a decent pop!)

TM: And folks, here comes the number one contenders, Sheena Michaels and Ty Langston get set for tag team action against two of the men involved in that Tag Team Cakset match as they face Lord Malichi and the Dead Man! Folks, that match is next!

(Sheena Michaels and Ty Langston get in the ring as we head to commercial.)

[Mike Jones]

(We come back from commercial and the arena lights are out and eerie music is playing as red smoke pours from the stage and Lord Malichi is elevated from beneath the stage. He then eerily walks to the front of the stage and waits.)

(Bell chimes! Crowd pops huge. Metallica’s Wherever I May Roam S&M Version plays as the Dead Man walks to the ring with Lord Malichi!)

DING DING DING!

The following tag team contest is scheduled for one fall. On the way to the ring, the team of the Dark Warrior, Lord Malichi and The Dead Man! And in the ring, the team of Ty Langston and Sheena Michaels!

TM: Well folks, the Dead Man is a former WNC Tag Team Champion, Sheena Michaels is a former Pure Champion, Ty Langston a former multiple time Hardcore Champion, so this should be a slobber knocker!

DING DING DING!

TM: And here we go, the rookie Lord Malichi will start out against Ty Langston, and King in recent weeks, Sheena Michaels has taken Ty under her wing.

King: You’re right, TM. And she seems to get awfully upset at him when he screws up.

TM: Well quite frankly, I think her and Ty go back a way, they both came into the WNC around the same time and they have been friends since that time. They share similar interests and I believe that Sheena Michaels cares for Ty Langston rather deeply. And the fact that Ty Langston’s in-ring career seemed to be taking a back seat to riff-raff, if you will, was cause for concern in Sheena Michaels eyes, at least.

King: Well, she probably saw him hanging out with those idiots Buzzed Bunny and Big Smoke and then realized she didn’t want to see him end up a low life idiot like them.

TM: Well, in any event, Malichi and Langston now with a collar and elbow tie-up. Malichi outmuscles Langston and goes for a Reverse Dragon Sleeper but Ty counters it and nails a Twist of Fate!

King: Wow! I’ve got to say, TM. I’m impressed with Ty right now, he is certainly showing some great agility here in the ring. I think Sheena is extremely focused.

(Suddenly, crowd becomes unsettled and we hear loud boo’s.)

TM: Well, the fans for some reason not reacting well to this match…..oh wait a minute, what the hell is this?

(We cut to a different view and Wrestling God dressed in suit and cowboy hat is walking down the rampway.)

TM: Oh come on, now, what the hell is Wrestling God doing out here?

(Ty Langston nails a Snap Suplex on Malichi and then sees WG who he yells at. WG puts his hands up and walks over to the announce table.)

King: Oh, wait a minute! I think Wrestling God, is gonna join us here on commentary! This is great!

(After a moment, WG puts on his headset.)

WG: Hello, Gentleman, how’s everybody doing today?

TM: Just what are you doing out here?

King: Easy, TM.

WG: Well I just thought I’d come out here and grace my adoring fans with my presence.

TM: Oh, please.

King: Don’t mind, TM. He just hasn’t had enough coffee yet.

TM: I hate coffee.

WG: Well I don’t know about you two, but I used to hate coming here to Florida. I love the weather, but all you had here before were tourists and alligators! But, ever since the election, I love it here!

TM: What the hell are you talking about?

WG: Well quite frankly, these people would rather vote for Pat Buchanan than that idiot Al Gore!

TM: WHAT?

WG: If it wasn’t for these people, we would’ve had an idiot like Al Gore in the white house!

TM: Oh please, this so six years ago.

(Ty Langston nails a Snap DDT on Malichi and tags in Sheena Michaels who goes to work on the newcomer with a series of chops.)

WG: Quite frankly, the only reason Al Gore received as many votes as he did was because this country is populated illegally by useless foreigners, like those damn Mexicans. And I can’t decide which one I hate more, Mexicans or Canadians! Like that idiot Chris Jericho!

King: Yeah, Canadians are a bunch of idiots!

TM: What the hell are you two talking about? There’s a match going on!

(Sheena Michaels nails a Pumphandle Slam and heads up top going for an elbow drop but Malichi moved out of the way and tags in Dead Man. Dead Man nails Sheena with a clothesline and then nails Ty as well who comes running in! Sidewalk Slam on Sheena Michaels!)

TM: Dead Man begginning to build momentum here!

(Dead Man with a leg drop now on Sheena. Ty runs at him! HUGE ARM DRAG! Dead Man big boots Ty out of the ring! Dead Man nails a Manhattan Drop on Sheena and heads up top! Flying Clothesline! Dead Man may have injured his knee there however! Dead Man limps to the ropes in pain. The referee checks on him. Ty Langston just tried to grab Dead Man’s leg from outside of the ring but Malichi shows up and takes him out. The referee distracted on the outside now! WAIT A MINUTE! MIKE BECKER JUST RAN IN THE RING! RKO ON THE DEAD MAN! NOO! Sheena with the cover. One! Two! Three!)

DING DING DING!

Here are your winners, Sheena Michaels and Ty Langston!

(Mike Becker walks cockily to the back taunting the crowd as he goes.)

WG: Well as much as I’m upset that a girl and a freaky teenager just won the match, I am so glad that Mike Becker got involved. I hope he broke his damn neck!

TM: How can you be so sick-minded?

King: Come on, TM. Lighten up. This is great, you should come out here more often, WG.

TM: (Obviously sarcastic). Oh yeah. That would be great.

WG: Hey there cowboy, I don’t appreciate sarcasm and if I EVER hear you say anything about me again, I will smack that ugly face right off of your head!

King: Haha! This is great!

TM: Well folks, in any event, coming up next, a HUGE Six Man Tag team match featuring…

WG: HEY! Listen to me, I’m talking to you.

TM: I’m just trying to do my job.

WG: I don’t give a rat’s ass what you think you’re trying to do, because right now you are disrespecting me, and I do NOT appreciate that at ALL!

TM: Allright, well that’s your opinion and that’s fine, but coming up next, an epic main event.

WG: What did you call me?

TM: OH FOR CRYING OUT LOUD! LET ME DO MY DAMN JOB HERE FOR A MINUTE! PLEASE!

(Awkward silence….)

WG: (Quietly but obviously angry.) Did you just raise your voice at me? DID YOU JUST RAISE YOUR VOICE AT ME?

(WG takes off his headset and stands up.)

WG (Sans headset but still yelling loud enough that everyone can hear him.) Don’t you ever raise your voice at me! Don’t look at me like that!

(WG smacks TM’s cowboy hat off. TM stands up looking angry but not about to do anything.)

WG: Whatcha gonna do there cowboy? Huh?

(TM adjusts his head set and sits back down.)

WG: Oh what’s a matter, did Mama Moss raise her son to be a sissy!

(TM stands up and throws a right hand at WG!)

King: WOAH, TM! RELAX!

(TM unloading on WG with left and right hands! OH MY GOD! WG just decked TM! WG taunts the crowd who are in an uproar and heads to the back as a referee checks on TM and calls for help.)

King: TM? TM? Are you alright? TM? We need help out here!

(We head to commercial.)

(We come back from commercial and head ringside.)

King: Well, I guess I’m flying solo here now. TM and WG got into a war of words, and obviously as soon as the fists started flying, WG got the best of him. And….well, I hope he’s okay. I mean……

(Bitches Love Me by Mindless Self Indulgence hits to big heat.)

King: Oh no. What the hell is this?

(Crowd boo’s as the Poacher cockily makes his way towards the announce table at ringside.)

King: Oh, great….

(Poacher takes off his sunglasses and puts on his headset and sits down.)

King: What are you doing out here?

Poacher: Well, the boss just sent me out here…

King: Oh great….

Poacher: Yeah, great to see you too.

DING DING DING!

The following is your main event and it is a six man tag match scheduled for one fall!

(Alone by Sanctus Real hits to a HUGE pop!)

Introducing first, the team of Pyro, The Saint Kid Omen and West Coast Wonder!

Poacher: Well King, these three guys are ready to get it on tonight. But they better get ready to lose! Ahahahahaha!

(The Broken by Fireball Ministry hits to big heat.)

And their opponents, first, at a combined weight of 495 pounds, Countdown and Mr. Reality Shane Warner!

(Lights go out and smoke pours from the stage as Blood hits to a mixed reaction.)

And their tag team partner, from the Hills of Romania, VENOM!

DING DING DING!

Poacher: Okay, let’s break it down here. Pyro and Countdown are gonna start things off. Oh man this oughta be great! These two have a fierce rivalry dating back months! Pyro strikes first with an arm-bar. Pyro goes for a German Suplex but uh uh uh, Countdown is too smart for that. Countdown with an amazing Arm Drag! Man oh Man! That was incredible! King have you ever seen such a perfectly executed arm drag?

King: It was just a standard arm drag…..

(Countdown goes for a Belly to Belly Suplex but Pyro counters with a Crucifix!)

King: Now THAT was impressive!

Poacher: Yeah, Pyro is a good wrestler. Too bad Countdown is a GREAT wrestler. Not as good as the Poach, but that’s another story.

King: Don’t flatter yourself Poach.

Poacher: Beautiful Elevated Back Body Drop on Pyro! Countdown showing his experience there and taking advantage of a rookie mistake!

King: A rookie mistake? Poach, made their pro debut as a tag team!

Poacher: But with Countdown’s superior intellect he advanced much quicker.

King: Well Countdown advances to the corner and tags in the number one contender.

Poacher: You mean the World Heavyweight Champion.

King: He hasn’t won yet!

Poacher: Oh but he will.

King: Whatever. Mr. Reality going to work on Pyro with those chops. That’s gotta hurt!

Poacher: Yes they do! I’ve been in the ring with this guy before and I’m not afraid to say he took me to the limit.

King: Uhh, Poach, you’ve never been in the ring with Mr. Reality.

Poacher: Yes, I have.

King: Oh, the battle royal to determine the guest GM?

Poacher: Yep!

King: You mean the one you lasted less than thirty seconds?

(Awkward Pause.)

Poacher: Yeah, but during those thirty seconds, I made a HUGE Impact!

King: Right…..

Mr. Reality nails a scoop slam! Reality tags in Countdown. Countdown stomping away on Pyro. Pyro nails a big boot on Countdown and tags in Kid Omen! Omen unleashing on Countdown. Omen nails a Snap DDT! Omen salutes the crowd but Countdown creeps over and tags in Venom. MY GOD! WHAT A CLOTHESLINE ON OMEN! OMEN JUST GOT TURNED INSIDE OUT! Venom picks up Omen and nails a Shoulderbreaker! Belly to Belly Overhead Suplex! A VERY Unorthodox move there for Venom! Venom locking in a rear naked choke! WCW just broke it up with a Missile Dropkick off the top rope! I think WCW knew that there was no way Omen would be able to out muscle the monster. WCW and Venom brawling now. Omen makes it to his corner and tags in Pyro! Pyro and WCW with a Double Suplex attempt on Venom but he counters! DOUBLE DDT! WCW runs at Venom! SPINEBUSTER! WHAT IMPACT! But now Pyro picks up Venom looking for the S-5! Venom gets loose and nails a Reverse Swinging Neckbomb! Kid Omen tried to get involved but he walks into a vicious big boot and he flies through the ropes and lands awkwardly on the outside! Venom goes for a Tilt-A-Whirl Backbreaker on Pyro but he counters it into an Arm Drag! Pyro now with a Senton Splash! Pyro tags in WCW! WCW now duking it out with Venom! He knocks him down with a Dropsault! WCW goes for a Shining Wizard but Venom moves and he nailed the referee! OH MY GOD! Mr. Reality tried to grab WCW but he gets a kick to the face sending him to the outside! Clothesline from Countdown! PYRO WITH THE SPEAR ON COUNTDOWN AND NOW THOSE TWO ARE DUKING IT OUT ON THE OUTSIDE! WCW in the corner now waits for Venom to get to his knees! MUSHROOM STOMP TO THE BACK! Wait a minute watch Kid Omen! Kid Omen springboards off of Venoms back and jumps over the ropes with a Springboard Shooting Star Press taking out both Pyro and Countdown! OH MY! WATCH WCW! WCW WITH A SPRINGBOARD MOONSAULT TAKING OUT ALL THREE MEN! What the hell is Mr. Reality doing? OH MY GOD! SPRINGBOARD FLYING CROSSBODY ONTO ALL FOUR MEN! MY GOD! THIS IS CARNAGE! OH MY!

(CROWD POPS HUGE!)

OH MY GOD! VENOM IS CLIMBING TO THE TOP TURNBUCKLE! OH MY GOD! NO! FLYING CLOTHESLINE AND EVERYBODY IS DOWN!

Crowd: THAT WAS AWESOME! THAT WAS AWESOME! THAT WAS AWESOME! THAT WAS AWESOME!

Venom throws WCW viciously into the ring and now Shane Warner joins him! They double team WCW! WHAT THE HELL IS COUNTDOWN DOING! OH MY GOD! COUNTDOWN JUST PULLED A TABLE OUT FROM UNDER THE RING! COUNTDOWN BALANCING THE TABLE BETWEEN THE APRON AND THE SECURITY RAILING! Countdown grabs Pyro! OH MY GOD! COUNTDOWN ON THE APRON! HE’S GONNA POWERBOMB PYRO THROUGH THE TABLE! WHAT THE HELL? KID OMEN RUNS AT THE ROPES! SPRINGBOARD INTO A BULLDOG ON COUNTDOWN AND ALL THREE MEN GO THROUGH THE TABLE! OH MY GOD!

Crowd: HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T!

OH NO! Back in the ring, Mr. Reality nails a Belly to Belly on WCW who landed right on his head! He may be out cold! Venom picks up WCW for a Chokeslam! NO! Wait a minute! Mr. Reality is pleading with Venom not to do it! What the hell? Wait a minute, Mr. Reality just got out of the ring. Pyro is staggering! OH GOOD GOD! REALITY JUST THREW PYRO HEAD FIRST INTO THE STEEL STEPS! OH NO! MR. REALITY GRABS THE STEEL STEPS AND PUTS THEM IN THE RING! NO! NOT THIS! THIS IS HOW EDDIE G WAS PUT OUT OF ACTION! OH MY GOD! VENOM IS GONNA GO FOR THE CHOKESLAM FROM THE TOP ROPE!

(SUDDENLY, CROWD GOES INSANE!)

WHAT THE HELL! OH MY GOD! IT’S MATT ACKERMAN! MATT ACKERMAN IS HERE! OH MY GOD! ACKERMAN UNLOADING WITH LEFTS AND RIGHTS ON MR. REALITY AND VENOM! NNN CLOTHESLINES VENOM TO THE OUTSIDE! SWITCHBACK 06 ON MR. REALITY! Oh no! But Ackerman looks like he might have hurt his ribs! He’s down in pain! WCW sees his opportunity though! WCW SPRINGBOARD SEATED SENTON TAKING OUT VENOM! WCW checking on NNN! Mr. Reality is back up! Stiff kick to the back of the head! Venom gets back in and he and Mr. Reality are double-teaming the hell out of WCW! MY GOD! KID OMEN IS UP! KID OMEN RUNS AT THE TWO MEN! BOTH OF THEM CATCH HIM AND THROW HIM TEN FEET IN THE AIR AND HE COMES CRASHING DOWN THROUGH THE ANNOUNCE TABLE!!!!! OH MY F**KING GOD!!!!!!!

CROWD: HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T!

WCW FIGHTS BACK WITH A LOW BLOW ON WARNER! MY GOD! WHAT A ENZIGURI ON VENOM WHO GOES OUT LIKE A LIGHT! WCW leaves the ring and grabs another table! He sets it up in the same way Countdown did earlier! WCW back in the ring beating on Warner! WCW stands on what’s left of the steel steps and puts Warner on the apron! WHAT THE HELL! BOUNCEBACK FROM THE OUTSIDE THROUGH THE TABLE! OH MY GOD!

Crowd: HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T! HOLY SH*T!

WCW gets back in the ring and OH NO! He walks into a Chokeslam attempt from Venom but he kicks his way free! Dropkick to the knees takes the big man down! Dropkick to the back of the head and Venom lands on the second rope! DIAL EM UP BABY! 619 CONNECTS! WEST COAST POP! COVER! ONE! TWO! THREE! FOUR! FIVE! BUT THE REF IS OUT! OH MY GOD! TIMEFREEZE OUT OF NOWHERE FROM COUNTDOWN! WHAT THE HELL? Countdown just shoved the ref over! Countdown puts Venom’s arm over WCW! NO! NOT LIKE THIS! ONE! TWO! THREE!

DING DING DING!

Here are your winners, the team of Countdown, Mr. Reality Shane Warner and Venom!

Countdown, Venom and Shane Warner celebrate in the ring although all three are in obvious pain as we see WCW holding his head in the ring, Pyro holding his head on the outside, Ackerman being attended to and Kid Omen lying in the wreckage of the announce table!